Q: Why does it take 3 Americans to change a lightbulb?
A: One to stand on the ladder, and two to carry enough lightbulbs until one is found that isn't defective.
Q: How can you tell it's midnight at an American airport?
A: When you see the 8:00 PM flights taking off.
Q: Why do American 18-year-olds take sex education courses?
A: So they can learn what they've been doing wrong for the past five years.
Q: What do Americans call a TV set that goes five years without need of repair?
A: An import.
Q: How can an American be certain that the car he's just bought is actually new?
A: When it's recalled by the factory.